


Fall

by RascalPink



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Angst, Depression, Heartbreak, Phone Calls & Telephones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2019-05-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 08:08:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16909287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RascalPink/pseuds/RascalPink
Summary: Dahyun wants to get over Sana even if it means falling.





	1. Chapter 1

Her heart is there, wedged between the two cushions of the couch. 

 

Sana had left while she stayed, picking up what was left of their relationship. It wasn't much, but it's enough for her, enough to remember the good times and the bad.

 

It started with a drink and it was damning. Dahyun didn't know then that she’ll be ripped apart, forced to suffer the turmoil as each day, she felt Sana get closer and closer yet further and further apart.

 

It was to be expected. Sana was promiscuous, even her own friends had warned her about Sana’s flirtatious nature. But as smart as Dahyun is, she didn't believe them. How stupid she was.

 

She didn't believe that a mask is only a mask. Take it off and you'll see someone distorted, a stranger in the flesh.

 

Sana kept replacing her mask every day and Dahyun tried to learn each and every one. 

 

The mask she showed to her closest friends, the mask she showed when she was out partying with them, and the mask she showed to Dahyun.

 

It was saccharine. She would speak sweet nothings in her ear - along with the honeyed gestures that would make Dahyun swoon. At times, Sana would take her to a hill, off to where her former high school was, and they'd watch the sunset together.

 

But like the sunset, the light would only disappear in a moment.

 

Suddenly, Dahyun didn't see her as much, didn't see her smile, didn't see the bony fingers clasping her own, didn't see the sweet greetings or the bitter goodbyes. 

 

Dahyun kept lying to herself that she was busy, but the words of Sana’s friends kept ringing in her ear like a mantra.

 

“You're not the only one.”

 

It was a test, she presumed. If she could understand Sana, then maybe she could be the one to keep her like a gift. But no, it wasn't that easy.

 

Gifts are not given so freely. She wasn't a kid waiting for Santa Claus. 

 

She couldn’t earn such a prize as brilliant as Sana it seemed.

 

Dahyun feels the breath of defeat take over. Her shoulders slump and she looks down at the ground, the intricate patterns of the rug they had bought earlier that year covered by her sock-covered feet.

 

She stills, frozen and unmoving. She stays there for minutes until the minutes weren't minutes anymore. 

 

A call comes.

 

One ring. Two. Three. Several.

 

Then it stops.

 

Dahyun takes the liberty to hear the voicemail that this person gave her.

 

“Dubu, are you there? Your girlfriend is here at the bar. She's been macking on some poor wo-”

 

She stops it. A click and it's gone. She throws her phone away, clanging loudly on the poor desk.

 

That was Sana’s money. She had insisted, with that lying voice and that terrible pout of hers. Dahyun wishes she could see that pout everyday, but then that meant she disappointed her in a way and she didn't want that.

 

Dahyun will have to get a new desk when Sana moves out.

 

She takes a glance at the clock. Three, four hours has passed. Each and every second indicates moving further and further away from the good times. 

 

Dahyun doesn't want to even think about the good times.

 

Because the good times would send her into madness. No one wants to dwell on the stuff they can't have unless they’re masochists and Dahyun’s no masochist.

 

Or so she thinks.

 

Living day on and day out with Sana, Dahyun felt herself descend into madness. Late nights, drunken nights, early morning pickups - it felt like she was merely a chaperone, a parent picking up their rebellious teen daughter from the police station.

 

Maybe she was, Dahyun never dared ask what their relationship was. 

 

She only assumed.

 

That was her mistake. 

 

They never really talked. Sana didn't want to talk. Well she did, just not about relationships. It always struck a cord whenever Dahyun would bring it up. So she didn't ask like a coward.

 

Dahyun is a coward.

 

That's one title she admits.

 

Sana was the shepherd and she was just a sheep following. Whatever Sana wanted to do, she wanted to do. Whatever Sana wanted to buy, she wanted to buy.

 

When Sana left her and broke her heart in a million different pieces, she just let it happen.

 

Because what is she if not a coward.

 

Dahyun hovers over her bruised phone. Her hand is twitching, her mind wanting her to act but her heart is quelling those morbid thoughts. 

 

Still, Dahyun takes it into her hand - brings up the contact and calls.

 

“Dubu! I've been calling where have you been?” 

 

Dahyun purses her lips, finding her words and her resolve.

 

Then she speaks.

 

“I'm sorry. I've just been busy.”

 

The bar is loud and noisy, but Dahyun manages to hear her just fine.

 

“Look. Your girlfriend is here-”

 

“I know. I heard your voicemail.”

 

Dahyun closes her eyes when Chaeyoung speaks. It's all giving her a headache. It's giving her so much pain she just wants to release the bottle that's been holding it all.

 

So she takes her jacket and walks out of the apartment when she decides to cut Chaeyoung off mid-sentence. 

 

“She's doing body shots now Dubs. Aren't you gonna-”

 

“It's raining outside Chae,” Dahyun comments. “How fitting.”

 

“What are you talking about? Are you outside? Do you have an umbrella?”

 

Dahyun feels the cold wind and the raindrops pellet her face. She always did like the rain. It gave her a sense of calm. It helps right now with what she's going to do.

 

Her heart is pounding.

 

“I’m at the bridge. I think you'll see me on the news tomorrow.”

 

“What are you eve-wait. What the fuck are you doing?! Don't you dare fucking do it!”

 

Dahyun's breathing gets faster and faster, watching the waves crash when she looks down. 

 

People say cowards are the ones who do this sort of thing, but Dahyun thinks that it's such a courageous act. It disables your movement, every atom in you tells you not to do it, but you do it anyway.

 

“Look I'll be coming. Don't you dare move!”

 

“Chae, you're my best friend.” 

 

“I know Dubs. I know I am and do you want to leave me behind?”

 

Dahyun shakes her head even though Chaeyoung can't see. Tears expel themselves from her eyes, but they get washed away as the rain gets stronger and stronger.

 

“This is what people do don't they?”

 

“What do they do?”

 

Dahyun could hear Chaeyoung's heavy breathing as she runs from the bar. She wishes she could meet Chaeyoung in the next life. She always was such a good friend.

 

“They leave a note Chaeng. You're my note.”

 

 

Dahyun takes a deep breath before she says.

 

 

“Say goodbye to her for me."


	2. two

“I don't know.”

These words are familiar, painfully so. Sana had always used them in conjunction with the presence of Dahyun.

I don't know. It's so simple yet so powerful and Sana believed they were the answers to her life’s problems.

Well, until now.

“What do you mean ‘you don't know’?” It’s your damn anniversary! How could you not know where she was?”

Sana fiddles with her thumbs as she keels over on the couch, eyes avoiding four — Momo came after she heard.

Chaeyoung had ran to her, ripped her off the bar table rudely, showing the finger to whoever complained.

As always, Sana didn't know.

It took her a moment to understand, confusion washing over her face, until slowly the news seeped into her mind.

Broken.

She felt broken — like a puzzle with one piece missing. No matter how much she looks, she’ll never find it. Maybe if she swims to the bottom of the sea, she’d find it.

She won’t do that.

Dahyun and her couldn’t be more opposite but they had something. 

A connection, like yin and yang, like good and evil; a beginning and an end. One can’t exist without the other. 

And for moment, Sana hesitates. She gulps and looks towards the door. She wants to run, get out of here, and find some peace in someone else’s bed.

But Momo is there, watching her, guarding her, cautious of her. 

Momo. She was the one who brought them together. She watched them grow up together. She watched them as they fell in love with one another. 

She watched them all this time. And she watched them fall out of love, and now she watches Sana as the girl loses her mind.

“She loved you, you know? Almost everything she did. It was for you.” Momo’s voice is low and deep. It doesn’t sound comical like usually does. She’s serious and rightly so. Her best friend is dead and Sana is at fault.

Sana frowns and brings her head low. Her intentions of running away is quelled at that exact moment. Dahyun always said she ran away when things got too rough. Most of the time, Dahyun was right.

“We broke up...hours before she—” Sana purses her lips, unable to say those words. She just can’t believe them, that it actually happened. “—she was getting too controlling. I-I couldn’t handle it anymore.” She sighs and eases her tense shoulders.

She hasn’t cried since then. She doesn't know why. She doesn’t understand the meaning of it. Maybe it’s the shock. Or maybe she doesn’t care much about it. 

“She was gonna hurt me.” Sana looks around, looking at the remnants of their fight earlier. “And I ran away, found a bar to ease my troubles. I didn’t know she’d—” She chokes up again, letting the silence taking over.

And it did.

Chaeyoung rests beside Sana and Momo takes a seat on the armrest. They just stare as the news on tv shift to Dahyun’s death. They haven’t found the body yet — the storm too strong and the waters too dangerous to generate a recovery team.

It might’ve been an hour but the malice in Chaeyoung’s voice is gone and Momo is napping on one of the chairs of the dining table. Sana still sits on the couch, eyes fixated on the tv screen, hoping for a development.

Then she remembers Dahyun again, what she did.

The accuser and the accused — those can’t live without the other either. She almost scoffs.

Everyday it was more of the same. She’d come home, exhausted from work. Then Dahyun would come from the bedroom, stone-cold and unforgiving.

Then it was screams. It was finger-pointing. It was vases smashed against the wall. 

She did not cheat. She didn’t do anything. She doesn’t know what got into Dahyun’s head but she didn’t do anything. It wasn’t her. She wasn’t who Dahyun was talking about. 

But Dahyun had some sort of seed that just grew in her mind, like a plague that just took over. It made her mad. It made her irrational, shaky, and chilling. 

It wasn’t the Dahyun she knew.

Then it came to this night, this long long night, and it ended. She ended it. 

And for the first time in years, she feels free.

She turns off the tv.

“Guys I’m gonna find someplace to stay. I don’t think I can take it here anymore,” Sana says before she stands up. The two follow, understanding in their eyes.

“You stay safe. Take a cab. Here.” Momo fishes out some cash from her pocket and hands it to Sana. “We’ll talk to you later.”

Sana nods and turns to the door and then walks out.

The silence in the apartment is eerie.

“Fuck!” Momo screams and punches the wall beside her. Her shoulders are shaking but she calms down, pulling her fist from the wall. She shakes the sawdust off, patting it on her jeans.

“It’s still under Sana’s name, you know? The apartment I mean. You’re gonna have to pay for that,” Chaeyoung quips, finding Momo’s outburst childish.

“I still can’t believe she died! How could we have known?!” Momo yells once more, eyes screaming at Chaeyoung’s calm ones.

“Anything could happen. She went insane Mo. She went fucking insane.” Chaeyoung slowly walks to the couch and Momo follows. “These past few hours I’ve been thinking why I went through with your plan.”

Momo runs a hand through her hair. “I don’t know why either.”

“Sana doesn’t deserve this. Neither of them do. We fucked up. So make up your fucking mind on how you’re gonna fix this.” 

Momo shoots her a look. “I-I don’t know if we can fix this Chae. It’s over. She’s dead and we can’t fucking fix it.”

“Set her up with a girl you didn’t fall in love with. I’m sure that would end in less of a disaster than this one.”

Momo stares at Chaeyoung. Both of them played their parts and acted well. They duped their friend, their best friend who go through the world and back just to make sure everything was right. They betrayed her and like like wildfire, the seed grew into madness, and it left their best friend dead in the bottom of the sea. They can’t fix their mistake, but at least they can mend it.

And at the same time, they make up their mind.

“Jeongyeon.”

//

It’s still raining. 

The pitter patters on the asphalt are music to her ears.

The puddles splash under her limping feet.

She’s not carrying an umbrella, letting the water run down her face.

She likes it. She likes the small thuds on her head.

It’s calming.

But it doesn’t mask the pain.

It hurts a lot; her whole body hurts.

She can’t feel her left arm nor can she feel the side of her face. 

But she doesn’t need it. She just needs to get somewhere before she starts caring.

She needs to get to her.

She needs to get to Sana.


End file.
